“Decipher Random”

In this silent night

tribute to silent fight

silence of the lamb

Or silence of a clam

hard shell outside

their scream outright

scream silenced in a shell

buried deep in a well

covered by water

life of a author

if spoken in common

silenced soft cotton

to wish is to ask

when said unmask

but silence is burden

un-achieving is certain

mouths can be shut

and words can be cut

but heart does beat

where chemistry meet

if mixture is chemicals

best spoken technicals

Incase, if un-spoken

words are unawoken

but golden just to flaunt

memories they will taunt

dilemma of one’s choice

between voice and noise

to utter or to not?

do we take the shot?

express or represent

caution to misrepresent

choice or a chance

Strap for the dance

Either random trance

or specified stance

One makes a choice

it makes or destroys

When left to silence

follows non-compliance

left in confusion

dreaming infusion

scratching one’s head

sentences left unsaid

to express or not to?

live one or two ?

all questions scatter

answers don’t matter

action without purpose

nerve missing nervous

Veiling this night

Concluding goodnight!

🤷‍♂️

Advertisements

“About Loneliness”

She asks, “even after we broke up from relationship. Why are you still nice to me?”

I smile remembering her words, and think to self. So what, we broke up. It’s not like we ended badly, in fact we ended sadly. She lives and has her everything in Thailand. As for me, I wish to go back home-country and help the government of my country, so that people’s welfare will be better.

Having to be a part doesn’t mean, we stop being nice. Daily, I practice diligently to be better and a nice person towards her and towards everybody.

The only person I’m least nice to is, myself. I really-really do not know how to take care of myself. Maybe, that’s why I like to take care and be concerned and thoughtful for the people around me.

Hoping that one day, a person will come to my life and teach me how to take care of myself. That I’d have a home and family so I wouldn’t get bored alone or would have to go seek for entertainment and companionship of friends.

And these days both can be easily found at a bar or a drinking place.

Really, there isn’t much activity to do at night, for the types like mine, and especially at Bangkok, where I stay currently. Here, nightlife means drinking night.

Well, I don’t have much friends to begin with and at this age. My friends are married and are about to be. So I don’t blame them for not showing up or hanging out like we used to when we enrolled in undergraduate or post graduate.

Among the few people I have managed to keep contact with and new acquaintance I have established.

Among them, no one likes to do pleasant nighttime activity. Like – go on drive, go shoot archery, go see a beautiful view drinking coffee.

My most unique hangout invitations are dismissed with an excuse.

But when it comes to a drinking plan, everyone is ‘in’

My night time choices are pretty much straight. Either go and drink everyday, and I do love drinking ‘whisky’ (Gold Label, Chivas Extra, and every Single Malt and Single Grain)

But the day I decide not to go to a bar or a club, then my that night stands still inside this small 29 Square meter apartment, called “Fuse Mobius Condominium.”

Here, I turn on tv and write my thoughts of present that could be useful in the future.

I reach out to my small balcony and smoke cigarettes.

At this point, I wonder ‘is cigarette like alcohol my drug, and are most drugs used by people to veil loneliness?’

I’m referring to those people, who are in fact, alone.

Well, there you have it my friends. This quote speaks, profoundly.

I wish we could understand; everything which we do not, now.

So that we would only feel troubled physically from our daily life hassle. Those physical problem which according to Buddha “originated because of us, we are the root of it”

But at least not feel discomfort, mentally.

Mental discomfort brings about inability to sleep. And I know, you all know this as well.

Sleep is such a beautiful routine of our life. Which I cherish the most and I hope my friends do as well. Those who didn’t receive enough of it. I bet, they would value it the most for having known its essence. On why we need to sleep enough in order to wake up a Happy Mind and begin the day happily.

I don’t know, how I will survive this system. Of having to wake up early for work and these days because of traffic jam, people have to wake up extra early. Especially, on those sudden nights, when I can only fall asleep after the sun rises. 🌞

And it happens quite often.

Hence, I hope that one day, I will be able to change the time schedule Policies of work and especially school, for students who are like and workers who are also like me. “The Nocturnal Group”

I won’t be able to change the world schedule, but I have a wishful thought that one day, I’ll change the way of life that doesn’t apply anymore, in Nepal, where I am originally from.

My today’s main reason for writing down my thoughts to become a social media post. Was to let anybody out there whoever faces loneliness discomfort, just like my introvert side.

So, today I decided to use this opportunity to share my lonely feelings and make friends with people who go through similar experience as I do. And even if some of you didn’t, we can still be friends.

Making friends and building friendship is one among the many ways, we will be able to unite the world and unite humanity.

Being alone all the time, rarely brings happiness to ones life, let alone to others.

Often having to be alone with, in silent room with never ending voices from the mind,

sucks the life out of a human soul.

(A scenario)

Imagine family gathering , where there no music, no smiles and laughter and most of all no one to laugh with. Doesn’t that suck the ‘fun’ out of the party?

Therefore, I have came here to extend my; distant and via social media; but warm and honest “Hand of Friendship”

Hi, my name is Varun and I’m a Thoughtmonger!

Here on social media,

May I be your “Loneliness” ?

A friend of all loners.

How do you do?

Nice to meet you, I wish you a pleasant and a beautiful day 🙂

Till then…

Not driving is best for:

I have always had phobia with driving, mainly because of I don’t want to be responsible for a crash, damage and death of self and most importantly others.

I am unable to estimate, how much space my car needs to overtake other vehicles. The speed of the car, the four sides we have to look using small mirrors to estimate is not in my practicality. My mind often roams around to survey the city, its people and how life is running and being affected by the environment observable, while on the road. I tell my self, that I can’t focus well in the road for not being able to drive. But, actually it’s the responsibility part. As a driver one must be responsible driver, not to hit another vehicle especially a bi-cycle and motorbike, not to make unwanted and unnecessary maneuver, follow rules and regulation, having that said no drinking and driving. Under the influence, we lose the sensation of how fast we’re driving. As you know, mass with, higher the acceleration, greater is the impact and damages, when we make a mistake or lose control.

So, I have always resorted to take taxi. Which gives me free handed time me to think and observe as much as I want, also to analyze things and write up future policies which would help make life better, as my mind is very often in “how to build a good governance for public welfare”

During this time, on the back seat of a taxi in Bangkok, I use this time to make phone calls to stay connected with dear ones. I call my Mom, my brothers and also have time to respond to each and every emails and messages on social media life Facebook Messenger and others.

Today, I came to wonder, if everyone was not driving, they too would be able to make important phone calls to their homes and respond back messages in a pleasant mood, during the travel stale time.

But, because most of you have to drive and concentrate on the madness of road traffic or even road rage, sometimes. Which disables people from much attention needing human contact. A reciprocal communication.

Hence, I not only support self-driving cars but also am looking forward with excitement, for the day, we won’t need drive anymore, just to make us feel stressed. Instead, we’d all have a free mind to use that time more financially productive or emotionally productive.

Cheers! To the future of commuting.

“Man”

Man since the beginning

Running towards winning

Thus began Universal filming

Since atoms started spinning

Man’s first fire,

Till man on fire

Men who don’t tire

To move only higher

Stamping people on hire

Unchanged, now and prior

Past men of the ancient cave

Their living conditions, unsafe

Fighting animals, oh damn brave

Rested, only when put to grave

In-between came, Man of hardwork

Bodily motors that of a clockwork

Man began their theories of network

Worked strategical beauty; artwork

Now a modern man

Man of evolution

Their best solution

A human execution

Extreme Resolution

To silence Confusion

A reflection of the current creed

Take a look of the current breed

Through the eyes of man

Group of man without plan?

Man of hunger and that also of greed

Why do we want, more than our need?

Man of blindness, Man without faith

It’s never too late, to let go of hate?

Man of corruption,

With no interruption

Man of tragedy

Screaming in Vanity

Man in a hurry, driving vision blurry

Risking everyday, without any sorry

Man given stress and input irritation

Neglectful leader’s; Monster immitation

Man of psychological assymetry

Remedying lifestyle Inconveniently

Man of so much potential

Blessed by starry celestial

Man of infinite wisdom

Just to live as a victim

What is wrong with man?

There’s so much he can

Let’s be a better man

Stop all these scam

Unite a better clan

And be a manly man.

#About Powerful Heir

Why do sons and daughters of powerful Personnel often misuse power and Parents are put to shame when they are caught red-handed abusing the power and then,

Parents might be forced to use any means necessary to prevent their kids having to spend time in Jail.

Power itself is a corrupting factor

Almost anyone who has it will be corrupted and mis-use it. If we are not taught how to handle and control power.

To control power, one must be taught through culture, practice and self-discipline. By being taught about right and wrong, greater virtue of life and everyone and everything living; that everyone deserves to receive justice and in order to give justice. One must not have any stigma on themselves of unforgivable type.

Parents who have earned greater power from their nation must use power in a righteous way. So, when their children see, observe and learn. They too can understand – what power is?

How to and how not to use it.

When children in their arrogance Mia-use their parents power. They should be re-reminded and guided thoroughly to understand the consequences of misuse of parental political or other powers they have inherited from the nation’s authority.

And when children don’t fall for jail time, parents do not have to use unnecessary means to bail their children out which will question parents own reputation.

Jail is not a good place, we all know that. Jail is a place where all the criminals of all kinds of crimes are put in one place.

Jail is meant as a correctional facility, but instead serves as a place for the criminals to extend connection. For kingpins to find their young pawns, a place where wrongfully charged people or young criminals lose their morale and are twisted to become a bigger criminal.

Hence, parents of normal household and at the top, High class families do not wish to see their children or loved ones go to jail and stay among other criminals and judged alike as criminals. Hence, they have to make bribery, connection phone calls and use of authority to suppress law for their loved ones.

But what about ones who do not have anybody to save them, who needs saving, who do not have families in Powerful or rich positions.

Do they not deserve justice?

Is justice only meant to serve and protect the high class?

Definitely not, law and justice is for all.

So, I include that people with powerful authority should practice their own higher-self of righteousness and use their opportunities to serve humanity.

While do themselves do not mis-use power. If, their children also did not put parents to such difficult to save them. Then, parents could too work with self-confidence to serve the nation to which filed they are in.

Therefore, we all must be good to do our best for the world. World is pretty quick to use any faults or mistakes of ours to use it against us and suppress us to evil works forever.

“Man Is Basically Good” – L. Ron Hubbard

Sonder

If we look at our world from outer space, we see that it is so weird to be sitting/standing at a weird horizontal angle, on a weirdly spherical object called “Thee Earth.”

From that view, of a telescope from space looking at us. We appear to be so tiny and of little importance. In regards to the large complaints of life we face, everyday.

Here on Earth, we live through our daily struggle, as if we matter the most, as if, what we do is the most important thing in the universe. We have desensitized ourselves to believe our size feature is an average size. While, tiny creatures like ants are perceived so small and of almost no importance, to us or our eco-system.

But, when we look at ourselves from the space-view. We too, are microscopically tiny microbes.

What I’m trying to say is, when it comes to what we see and what is actual are two different dimensions of vision.

And.

If, what we see is not understood by us easily, then how can we expect to understand our inner soul and the path to ultimate happiness which comes from fulfillment. Being, complete.

Are we even viewing and speaking to our soul, correctly?

What if, Soul is not at the center of our physical body, that makes us feel soul is: “so close yet so far.” What if, soul lies way too deep inside a universally created simulation that creates an A.I. Dimension, which has been told to us, is the illusion.

Hence, we are unable to communicate with our soul and thus, we do not understand our soul and ponder in emptiness, when it comes to fulfillment.

Imagine, inside your body too, there is an infinite Universe and at the center lies the soul, in the form of light, that comes from an even deeper fire.

To be aware of this inner dimension, which is illusionary, but real to our mind construct, is the first step to get closer to your soul and to hear its inner-voice, clearly.

Rest, you’ll figure out all by yourself to create your world.

All the best 👍🏽

Does love ever win?

That was the question I asked, God.

I, often saw in the cartoons as a kid and later in anime and later in Movies as I grew older.

That, hero and heroine, who loved each other truly and deeply for real. Always managed to fight against all odds and preserve & prevail love.

So, I also began to wonder if my love for my first girlfriend was real and true. No matter how difficult the situation and no matter how many obstacles came on our path. I thought, we too could pass through and reach our desired destiny of Love.

When, it became difficult to reach as expected, together. Due, to being two different people with completely opposite thought of life and so many external factors, brought in my society.

Furthermore, separate working lifestyle, having to look after family by both of us. We were separating from each other.

And often, I’d look towards the stars, feel the sky, space and time, imagine my vibe and gently whisper to God, with a slight tear in my eye.

God, does love ever win?

I never received a direct answer to that.

However over the last four years. I came up with few variables of my own through inner- talk.

I reflected within and answered things like.

+ For Love to win, Love must be true and real from the both side. I wondered such criteria.

Other inner answers and questions were.

+ For love to win, we are tested for a long period of time, how long is unknown.

+ When I ask if love ever wins, it became a question of winning and Love is not about winning. Maybe I should ask, does true love ever unite?

+ Are we both trying our best from both side. Is it a true love for both party and towards both party. If not love cannot unite.

And when I would see us separating due to our opposite lifestyle. I used to wonder, Maybe, first I should ask what is Love?

Am I sure I understand what Love means?

~ if not then Love cannot win.

Till today, after four years, I have not received the answer to, Does true love ever win, like in the movies.

Maybe it works out for some people who are a perfect soulmate match. While, t may not be the same case for everyone else. I guess, some soulmate are here to only help us grow, because we have desired a life to be rich or powerful. And they are just here to help us proceed to our destiny.

But still, my question remains to god, now (modified)

God, Does True Love Ever Unite?

(Let me know what do u guys think)

“Cool Night”

Pull out a cigarette

Whip out a lighter

Gently press clicker

To Let the fire burn

Consecutive puffs

Cigarette burns

A long deep puff

Tilting head up

Oh look!

Moon is watching full

Breathing out like a dragon

Amaze eyes around stars

Surrounded in Nepal’s nature

It’s partly clouded 21 Degree

Intrinsic fragrance greenery

Clear Astrological scenery

Duet (Poetry)

Two people sitting on a bench

Next to each other, facing west

They do nothing, except breathe

Every now and then,

one looks at another and smiles

The other turns to their partner

And smiles in return,

While sparkly glances are exchanged

Then, turn back to view the setting sun

While gently breathing the cool wind

Each cool breath they inhale

An inner smile is felt

Silently they feel the gush of wind

Whizzing through them naturally.

Slowly, evening fades into night

And city lights are all observed.

One turns to other and points

towards the Waning moon

Signaling with their eyes

Blue is the sky

Darker are the clouds

Clouds move with wind

To cover the sight of the moon.

They breathe silently again

Freeze-frame the moment

To smile forever

With the silent wind.

An act of being,

Duet poetry in itself

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Political Problem

The problem with the world is, some of the politicians. They think they know what we want. They think they know, what is good for us.

Where as, incase of some politicians, they don't think, they know for sure; they are here for corruption and the problem with us is, we try to justify their intentions and actions, where they did not even have at all.

That's all…

It's the year of the empowering voices. Friends of you have anything to say or share. Speak up, the power is yours….

Uncertainty

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Out of a human life;
What is needed, and
What is expected to happen?

Is growing up enough?
Physical growth requires nothing,
It comes naturally to body basics.
Just like a newly born fish knows immediately, how to swim.

Then, is mental growth the aim?
Enabled from curiosity and questioning,
To understand the nature of things.
But, curiosity incites rebellion;
A nemesis of standard social institution.

To rebel is a burden for any individual,
And a threat to their family’s safety.
Unless, an idea has been generally accepted,
Which was always aimed for prosperity.

My appraisals for those who stood alone,
And withstood the test of time and society.
Like, men of science with extra-ordinary hypotheses
Who thrived through ridicules, which became the founding laws of Science;
(A proven theory.)
Like, men of humanity, who struggled for freedom as a whole and prevailed.
Note: While end results were celebrated;
The in-between struggle hardly acknowledged.

Perhaps, spirituality could save us.
Provide us with the sweet escape;
From stubborn perception of conceived reality.

But is that enough?

When has fleeing duties and responsibilities,
Ever been a purposeful life?
At the same time, why does life’s purpose hold so much importance?
That men go insane without, a purpose to live by.

An introspect: Is purpose a star child of Ego?
An imaginary confirmation to illusionary identity.
Or, is purpose an inner human will to exist?
(Darwinian survival laws at play)

In a perplex contradiction between: nature of man, his life, his thoughts and perception; society, societal norms, its rules and regulations; Nature and Universal laws that govern the cosmos.

I ask you, “Oh! Supreme”, help me understand,
What may become of a man under such webbed circumstances?

“A Want To Write”

Since, burnt dark mark tainted; 

My natural hand and its fingers 

Dreamt I have of signing execution 

Death, enraged wild gunslingers 

While, pain can be torture 

Regret becomes tragedy 

Add+ Isolated addiction

And that’s foolish strategy 

Prisoner of mistake 

In one’s own mind 

Blame and shame

Un-left behind 

When lost in despair 

Dark-matter surrounds 

Dreaming Dictatorship 

As Crazy as it sounds 

But nothing lasts forever 

Especially dark matters

Light eventually engulfs;

One’s illusion, shatters 

Beautiful while it lasts 

It lasted after all 

Everything that lasted 

Lasted for my all 
 
Flash-forward to today 

I’m nothing like before 

Beauty, I love seeing

Beautiful, I do adore

Classic ‘Art of Writing’

How I wish to explore 

‘Em alluring ‘Cursive’

I would like to restore 

Search archaic poetry 

With thee I deplore 

If I fail and request aid

Would you not ignore? 

A Plot: “Tragic Dream Story”

This takes place in America. 
(The end scene before I wake up) 
I’m walking away because of this older white dude. Who wouldn’t allow me to give her, her long golden chain earrings. So I give it to the older man angrily. Cussing at him. 
As I walk away there is an explosion. The old man is incinerated. She was right next to him. She gets pushed away from the explosion. I see the chains flying off in the settled and not so cold snow  
I grab the golden chain earring and run towards her. There is David Cumberbatch attending to her. He leaves after I’m there. 
(I carry her and try to walk away from the chaotic scene. She’s bleeding on the right side of her stomach.) 
She asks, “is this really happening?” I’m trying to live with you and saying that she passes away. 
(And then I wake up) 

(The story begins from here)
I am at a concert in America. I’m standing where the supporters of Shotty Horroh (Battle Rapper from Manchester) are standing. Shotty Horroh makes entrance. High fiving everyone. I’m the second one to receive high five as he walks past. He high fives two more and then begins singing and Rapping. 
We are all hooting for Shotty Horroh

A group of crowd has formed a dancing group. I’m in it too. 
I see a girl, wearing a black leather jacket. We’re trying to hit the conversation going. I’m wearing power glasses and look like a student with some metal t-shirt and hoodie with Iron Maiden print on it. 

This girl says you don’t fit the crowd, what do you do? I prepare myself to blast a numerous things to tell her about what I do. 

I ask her “are you ready?”

She says “don’t tell me.”

I respond, “I should say, figure it out” 
She gives a gentle laugh. 

We have clicked as friend, already. We are dancing to the song. Her friends gather near her. She says “I will hang with my friends, some moment please. 
I gently give her space and step back to the crowd nearby where others are also dancing to the beat of some alternative song. She has decided to leave the place where we are currently, which is taking place in an open outdoor area. The weather is chilled and the time is about; when the sun is near to set. 

As she walk away looking backwards at me. I hear Shotty Horroh singing “Last Resort” by Paparoach. The crowd has gone wild and so I also want to jam my ass off while singing along. 
I move closer to the crowd and dance metal style (jumping, metal hand signs) 

I look at her she is leaving. I take a look back, she is about to leave. I follow her. 

Just next to this party. There is another party going on where people are just simging on a mic and it seems anyone can join. We walk through the crowd to go closer and see. And suddenly; before I know. I find myself so close to the mic area where there is a band of musicians with their instruments next to the mic.  She tries to sing and I make up hum sounds and La la la la’s  and sing along with her. We are doing great until another girl comes to the mic before us and sings her own stuff. I feel offended that she has ruined my friends moment. I feel for this girl, whom I just met as a close friend. 
I ask the girl in front us, to not to ruin my friend’s moment. The second girl says “beat me in signing” so I go to her mic. The music is playing. And we are making up our own songs, while singing one sentence at a time. 
The second girl wants to leave singing. Maybe I’ve beaten her or maybe she had enough.  Another guy steps in her place. We have gone in metal mode of singing challenge. When it was about to get intense. Two cops show up and handcuffs this guy and me and this another dude. They start walking us to the station. The police leads, we are walking down the road. He is holding one end of the handcuff and the other end is cuffed to my right hand where I see myself wearing grey gloves. 
I ask the police. What was the word we spoke that ended us up in handcuffs. The police guy responds “metal music is banned in America” 
I say ” I didn’t know”, “it’s my first time in America” “is there anyway sir, you could; please, let me go” 
While we are all walking down the road. The other guy and the police leading him are walking in front of me and some people from the crowd where we were previously having singing challenge; has come and joined the walk to go till station to see if we’re alright. 
The police leading me, loosens my cuff which slides off easily through my gloves and I run backwards up the hill. 
I return back where my friends are. It’s a different area than, where we were before. 

I reach a place where friends and some people are chilling in front of a house. I know some of them. Music jam is happening. We leave after sometime and find ourselves is this same open area where music festival is happening. I meet one more girl. Her name is “E.” She is an old friend from where I used to work. She used to be simple, back then. But now, she too, has turned into metal music lover type. Has a white t-shirt with black jeans and black leather jacket on. 
She asks ” how are you?” I replied “I’m good” 

Then she ask “why didn’t you post any pictures on social media” 

I begin to think to myself (“playing ghost makes an impact and keeps them wondering”) Hmmm (it’s a wonderful strategy, must apply it more often) 
Little further, I noticed her boyfriend on the rooftop of a one floor small building which has a bar, underneath the building. I see him playing the drums with a group band. 

I told E, “your boyfriend is looking at us, so I’ll leave.”

She smiles. 

I make my exit from E’s sight and catch up to my friends, nearby, we walk around. And come to find myself close to this same building where the bar was located. From outside, through the window pane, from where I see E, making-out with her boyfriend, but didn’t seem like a passionate one.  I try not to look. Then I look again and see her dancing metal style with her leather jacket, off. 
I think to myself, this girl has changed so much. 
Just 10 steps away from me, there is a glass door with metal frames to enter and exit the bar. 

E comes outside of that bar place. Outside, where I already am, outside of the bar also has a different section of the music festival. There is music everywhere and a different crowd everywhere for different music section. Kind of like Rave style of festival, where different music is being played next to each other after a certain distance not to cancel out each other’s music and disturb.  I hear some chilled tango going on. E is dancing outside too, I walk forward towards E and dance in front of her. The music changes to more tempo filled salsa which was of romantic type. We hold each other’s hands and dance in a mixed bold dance and salsa,  to the best of salsa. The dancing platform is a wooden area which starts flat at first, after a certain point it inclines upwards and again it continues as a flat surface but at a certain height, which is connected to supported beams. We’re dancing exactly on the inclined surface, carefully, not letting her fall.  

We’re dance towards up the incline wooden platform and before reaching the top of the platform, E feels scared and we slide down, every now and again. I carry her weight on me and don’t let her fall. 

There is one couple dancing below the incline surface where it starts to become flat again and one couple above us, where the incline ends and becomes flat again moving away from me. 
On one of the the slide down part, while dancing. We both slip and crash into the couples dancing below. We all fall, off the wooden surface and on the the grassy area. 

Their shoes have come off when we crashed into each other. I apologize many times, while picking up their shoes and hand it to them. E also helped me to gather, both their shoes.Of which, the girl was wearing red high heels and the guy had black leather shoes. 

At the same time, I noticed E’s golden earring, shaped like a long chain and had a round solid gold hanging at the end of the chain type earrings; had fallen out of her pocket. I  picked them up and we walk away, as if to leave. 

As we make our exit from this crowded area. At the outer side of the crowd watching the dance, there was an older man sitting on a chair, dressed formal but with badges like an officer of police or army. 

As i was about to hand over the earrings to E. This white Canadian older man. Who didn’t like my presence near E, seemed  like he doesn’t trust me near E. 

Maybe because we fell while dancing and also made one more couple to fall. Or maybe it was my metallic attire prints on my hoodie, he didn’t happen to like because he judged the way I was dressed.  

He matched the appearance to be of that of a high class status people from the he was dressed. This man, E and me. We were all in a close perimeter of eachother.  I tell the man. Okay, you hand it to her. And walk away to give space. Assuming he’ll hand it over to E and E will follow me. 
As I walk away cussing cussing at this man on a talking to self manner. 
Behind me, I hear a small explosion. And look at immediately. In an instance 
I noticed the man is not there anymore. Must’ve been incinerated by the blast. She was a bit next to him. The blast happened behind the man and must’ve blocked most of the blast protecting E. 

She got pushed away from the explosion. I see the golden chains flying off in the settled and not so cold snow. (This area had not been cleared of snow, as it was further and near the end of the crowd sitting or standing area)
I run towards where the golden chain earring flew off to and run towards E. There is David Cumberbatch attending to her. He leaves after I’m there. 
(I carry her and try to walk away from the chaotic scene. She’s bleeding on the right side of the stomach and there’s blood all over her) 
She asks herself, out loud. Is this really happening? Looks at me and tells me, I’m trying to live my life with you, (saying that she passes away).
I came to realize, while we danced she had changed to a different thought towards me and wanted to take a chance with me. 
I’m left with this thought and feeling, stunned and emotionless. E has passed away and I’m left staring at the sky 
(And then i woke up, find myself on my bed, in Kathmandu) (What a dream!!!) 

“Too much is not even enough”

I’m surprised at how I handle my matters of the heart. Would it be possible to cut the sense of “idea of love” Find that one nerve which controls emotions and feelings. Cut it out and give it to the ones who need it. 
On that bombshell here’s a few lines 
“Too much is not even enough”

In a world, where; 

giving too much is a crime. 

I know not, how to give less. 

Without devaluing precious time
Had man no weakness

He would be powerful

Strong men are desired; 

Will that be wonderful? 
Love for power and sought for love; 

don’t mix well. 

Like, trying to enjoy the whisky; 

Burning in hell. 
In this world; some go, slow 

While others try to go, fast 

Asking the fast, to slowdown 

Is asking him, can you be last?
Love is a slow process 

But time waits for none

While waiting for love 

One’s life, may be gone 
Raise her deadwood heart

Is not, one of my forte 

Sons of Sparda would fail

Even Virgil and also Dante 
At least sluggish can try 

To pace up the base 

But for fast-forward 

Steady, loses the race 

Unlike tortoise, who are steady 

Steady, when fragile 

Not recommended for cheetah

Who is speedy & agile 
A slow pacemaker gets run over 

Even when, on the right track

Don’t blame his unusual crazy 

When youuu!!! Made him: Crack 
Time only flies, when missed 

So let’s take; chance at hand 

I have accepted you despite 

Being, queen of the damned 

A Love Story Beyond Time And Tide


While she’s fast asleep, 

I scribbled all night

She slept at her’s,

As I waited at mine

Clock; often is too early 

Suddenly it becomes late

Time; too early to assert 

Yet, too late to dismiss 

I wished her pleasant dreams

Wondering, where she’ll begin

Imagined, she starts alone

Together we meet, before she wakes
I once heard, thoughts travel fast

Made Einstein think, is quantum trash?

One said, social philosophy backs thought

Others, not unlike the natural speed of light

Last one exclaimed, think!

Then you realize, you’ve arrived

Light, it reaches by time

Daydreams of my soul adrift

Gently I will tuck myself,  

Right next to her, goodnight…

A Trial in Writing 

I like writing poetry

It is Integrated in me 
Friends think, it’s too simple 

and nobody wants to see  
I like their thoughts

It challenges my skills 

I consider myself a nobody

But can’t speak for my thrills 
A dictionary, is what I need 

To inherit bombastic word 

But I’m a simpleton 

Simple words, I insert 
Reading could help me 

But I barely read 

I do talk a lot 

And I barely breathe 
I do love the critics 

They help me grow 

If I put more effort 

I could be a pro 
Alas! I am a human 

With many flaws 

Rebellion is in my blood 

Hence, I rebel the laws 
I am stupid for not listening;

Thank-you friends for mingling 
I owe you all, time 

It doesn’t belong to me 

I’m up for hangout 

whenever I am free 
Friends are my life 

Thank ‘God’ for that 

They bare my stupidity 

Companion to my path 
Gratitude is all I have left 

Because ego serves no one 

Life wouldn’t be the same 

Without friends, to have fun.  

Let the soul sleep, it’s healing 

Waking up is a choice. 

But wake up to what,

Is my question?

For a soul who has seen 

And felt nothing but pain.

Cruelty of the world 

And cunningness, everyday.

For him only sleep heals 

Dreams soothe, while healing. 

Physical and mental pain of enemies 

Seem and feel so much easier 

When once, one feels the loss of love 

Ones who loves never leaves

Ones who left never loved 

The in-between, lies their fate 

Destiny bound from Karma 

Yet, not all faces Karma 

If we fight it against odds 

Or had we surrendered 

Our actions upon lord, himself 

The hate and pain 

Will make every, a man.

Without loss, just a boy.

Time and generation is cruel,

But, laws of nature must be followed 

Only suffering makes a man strong 

Sharpens his potential and let’s grow 

Yet, I see flaws, in the laws 

Why must one suffer?

Why must one know,

What pain and loss is?

Is there no forgiveness,

To an innocent heart?

Does a innocent smile, 

Have to be shattered? 

Is it necessary 

If so, what is the purpose? 

How can one love 

When he receives hate 

Why do we ask compassion 

From a man who received pain 

If we wipe someones smile away

He will wipe ten other’s, tomorrow 

And is this the life cycle, we wish to be in?

Is this our favorite chain-reaction?

In this hateful and selfish world

Let my soul sleep until it wishes to

Hence, Waking up is a choice

But wake up to what

Is my question? 

Element

When death is coming

just relax and enjoy it 

(Our/My) lord will come

to take me; and 

yes, it will be scary

I might face punishment 

Because lord might be displeased.

I can only think of 3 things 

that will be visible to me, then

Darkness in all direction 

except for the center; which 

will have been pierced by fire 

And just slightly before fire 

Our/ (for that day) my lord, 

will have come for me. 

Places to go in Thonglor, Bangkok, Thailand


Friends, if you ever came to Bangkok and you are the type who likes to drink and chill in nice bars with nice food. Then Thonglor area is the best place for you. This area is filled with one of the best bars in town with style. 

One of them I recently went to is called ‘The Commons’ which is located in Thonglor Soi 17 (Soi means Alley) 

It’s a market like place. Where you are surrounded by various foods and drink. And you can order from all of them at once. 

###

Another one, I recently went to is called “HashMe” This one if located at the end of Thonglor soi 9 road. It serves one of the best Waffle styled foods in a very different way. With cheese, bacon, carbonara sauce. I swear, never have I enjoyed waffle like this before. Got a nice bottle of sweet sparkling wine and some steak. I seriously, recommend this place to everyone. Just check out some pictures below 

“Please, suggest me a brand new word for, ‘Unity'”

Good evening everyone,

It’s Wednesday 6:31 PM in Bangkok, Thailand. I just got out from my condominium at Ramkhamhaeng Soi 3(Alley). There’s a lot of traffic jam, just as i am about to exit to the main road. The traffic jam is because it’s close the the intersection. And my taxi drivers added, it’s because of the rainfall. Both the statement is correct.

I look beside the road. There I see 4 motorbike taxi waiting for the moment; waiting for customers. Others might be out there taking passengers.

I feel something in my heart. Looking at them sitting on their motorbikes with their plastic raincoat on. While it’s shimmering lightly. The heavy rainfall has calmed by now.

I feel for their lives and wonder how their life must be like. I wonder no matter how hard their work is; is their life better though?

I’m a dreamy person, I wish for everybody in this world to have someone too; In their life to go back home too. After a hard Labor Day, I wish for them to be awaited by warm food. A whole days work can and may be hard, laborious, tedious, etc. Here I’ll not feel emotional for anyone because, this is life. It teaches us to become better, efficient, productive and to grow. This is the way of the nature; set way before even time existed, I’m guessing.

But, I do feel emotional for every person on this planet if they don’t have a home to go to. If they don’t have family to ask them about their well-being. Especially, if they don’t have the opportunity to receive a happy, content good nights sleep.

Beside wishing them all well-being. I am also aware of the fact that not everybody has a home, family, food and a warm bed to sleep or sometimes; worst case scenerio, not even a friend to talk with.

And this is what I would love to put my effort to work about. Welfare of people. All of them. Everybody. For the ones who have nobody; I would like to see an organization whose workers are like me. And maybe even better than me. Who shares same mentality, wellness, compassion for people whose life is filled with difficulty and loneliness.

I wish for this organization to serve people and not only serve, but also teach them to be productive, efficient and mostly to help one another. Greediness achieves nothing. Unity achieves it all. So, in a way what I am proposing is People’s Unity and gradually World Unity.

Unfortunately, words like People’s Unity and World Peace have not only seen obstacle but for now I feel. Even the word is tainted.

So finally, to readers, I would like to request them, to suggest me words that are synonymous to people’s unity and welfare. Requesting for suggestion of a brand new name to represent the welfare goal and objective to serve people.

One helping another. One helping all. All helping one. All helping all

Cheers!!! 🙂

Experience of a Human Life

Thinking of all the experiences, all human beings must go through, (sigh…)

These experiences are not what one would call good or pleasant experiences in any way, but somehow essential, according to “Thee Nature”

These experiences include things like:

  • Accidents Of All Kinds
  • Broken House and Family
  • Getting Your House Robbed
  • Cunning Enemies
  • Getting Heart-Broken
  • Fraudulent Activities Against You
  • Mental Tension
  • Emotional Blackmail
  • And the list goes on…

 

Rarely, we avoid some of these experiences, but unluckily suffer many of them as time goes by.

In this human living, Suffering plays such a vital role in growing up.

One reason could be because unlike happy moments which we forget easily; inner distress which arises from having suffered the pain is what comes to our remembrance the most.

Let’s give it a trial. Try to remember all the happy moments of our life. We will find, we can only remember a handful of them, even though we shared many happy moments with good people.

Now, let’s think of all the sufferings we went through. Don’t we remember all of them with details?

Like it happened yesterday! (Sigh…)

 

Sigh- because this is one of the negative capacities of our human brain. To – quickly forget the good moments and happiness. But remember the sufferings for a long time.

 

And, the case is similar, when someone is good to us 100 times. We won’t see that or remember it and be grateful. But let this same person commit one bad act towards us, intentionally or unintentionally. And we will remember this bad conduct for a long period of time; completely ignoring the 100 times of good conduct.

Some argue that “Impression” is an emotional element of life which has to be maintained always. On this subject matter, my thinking and perceiving lead me to believe that yes, the fault is in fact in our stars. It is us; who see, think, and act in such a way.

 

Analyzing and judging, waiting for someone to make mistakes; so that we can get a good laugh about it. I am not talking about strangers only; we do this to even our close people, our close friends. We judge them by the way we perceive them in their everyday endeavors. But we do not know why they do, what they do. And similarly, others are doing the same things to us.

 

So definitely, the fault lies in our own self for being this way, for allowing our minds to function in such a way. This way of behaving happens as a side effect from the habit of gaining experience through pain and suffering.

 

When we keep doing one thing or working in one fixed method, we train our minds to function in this habit.

 

Suffering from circumstances is not a bad thing. We do grow “a wise”, from our mistakes and from analyzing our experiences.

 

One bad effect of the above statement is that we also create the circumstance which makes us suffer or others and this is not good, on our individual part.

 

We cannot forget what our mind experiences, especially the bad experiences. But we can overpower it by creating an even larger number of good experiences.

 

Bad experiences are like Black Magic. The result is a painful twist, but the lesson learned is profound.

 

So, use your experiences, all good and bad, to guide you towards your future and your future situation/circumstances, but don’t hold on to any suffering forever. Give others a chance, expect nothing from them. So, we won’t be disappointed. Let them live their life and let’s not analyze their actions and behavior in case no one is being affected or hurt through their action.

In my life, I found out that all of them are just like us. Unknown to and still learning, how to be social among others, while still trying to be the person, their inner asks of them to be. In order to display each and everyone’s unique individuality. It’s a complex feeling.

 

Let’s give everyone a break. Let’s give ourselves a break. Let’s forgive others and before that let’s forgive ourself too, for all the mistakes we made and all the sufferings we caused.

 

However, one thing we should do is use caution. Give them a chance, but neither be fooled by them.

Live and Let Live…

                                                                                                                                       

Credits #ShutterStock


Define: Energy

I am here; and
I was always here
I am neither created, Nor
Will I ever be destroyed
I was always here; and
I will always be here

Maybe, not in the same form
But for fact, I will be
I was something else, then
I am this, for now
I will become something else,
in another time

Transforming from one – another one
Yet, ‘core’ will always remain the same
Customized and Upgraded, maybe
But never, a complete new
And never, a complete different
That’s, each personal ‘identity’
A unique, which we always were
Always is, and always will be
So, just be…

We are unique ‘Energies’
Dancing, some see it
Vibrating, others feel it
Whether be: Dancing or Vibrating
Important fact: We always will be
Whatever will be, will be;
So, let’s just be…

~Thoughtmonger V~

Dream Story 30/April/2014

We were on a taxi, I was on the left passenger seat and she, on the right. I looked at her. She didn’t seem to care. I noticed she was knitting and she had put her whole attention there on knitting; while the taxi drove.

 There was so much silence between us. Sometimes, it felt I was on that taxi alone. 

I’d get bored and look outside taxi window and be lost in my own thoughts. The taxi ride was so long while it kept moving. Then, I look to my right. She’s still knitting. And it happened again. I realized that I wasn’t alone on this taxi but for a few moment, I had again forgotten I wasn’t traveling alone. Finally tired. I lay down to rest in a napping position. Facing towards her and looking at her with my dreamy eyes. 

I stared at her for a while. Then slowly she looked at me and looked back at her knitting work. She looked at me again and looked away. And finally, looked at me for the third time and then she smiled.

She put aside her knitting and she smiled, as if she had forgiven me for a small misunderstanding we might’ve had. Her smile was a relief to me, as if I hadn’t needed anything more than that, ‘Smile’ 🙂 

Whom to choose as a Partner

People of the world, fall in love and break off from their love, everyday. 

We often go pick the wildest partner, whom we first meet, who has come to fill our void. Without giving it much thought. It’s all good and great in the beginning. But after a while, slowly the whole story unfolds. Slowly, we discover each other’s annoying and sometimes disgusting habits. 

When we were dating and kept to ourselves, it was all good. But then to some, later we realized that we are shy to take our partners to meet our parents, or friends and working colleague. 

No doubt we love them, but just that we don’t want to be judged by the strangers eyes, on our preference of our partner. Truthbe told, we shouldn’t be judged. But we feel it, anyway. 

And hence later, our partnership begins to come to the point where we evaluate each other’s competence on how well can they look after a family. Whose gonna earn and how much is needed. These questions, make or break anyone’s relation. It’s the final barrier to a married life. 

The point is, we often go for the wildest ones and anyone we choose. We will have a trial period for everyone. 
So, if all we need is a partner for companionship. My suggestion is to find a partner, where you lack in and the other can provide that support. 

Like for instance, a person who doesn’t know how to drive can look for a partner who can, in bigger example. A business person can look for a partner who excels in Accounting and Finance. Etc. you get the point. 

I mean, while we look for a partner, why not look for one who can actually provide the lacking booster to each other’s life. And that will be a partnership. That is a true companion. Because even if it doesn’t last. At least you will have learned to survive and will have grown in your skills where you once lacked. 

Me, I choose it this way. I don’t have the most handsome face, so I can’t be picky over pretty and beautiful. 

But I do have a heart of gold. A cup overflowing with love. And that’s what I mainly look for, besides other minor things… 
In conclusion, I would like to say, choose a partner, from whom you can learn and grow. Or at least balance that side of your life which you were unable to manage. And you do the same for your partner. Because, never forget “Partnership is a two way street.”

“All the Best” 
~Varun Thoughtmonger 

Hard to Be Forgiven

It’s hard to forgive others. When you’ve never been forgiven. 

For anything; big or small
How can one share love to others. When he has never received, compassion. 

How long will a person’s goodness last. While it’s being tested over and over again, everyday. When, most of us change in the first bad experience we face. 
Have your love rejected and we’ll end up doubting our beauty. We begin to ask question like, Am I Ugly? 
We muster up our thought and courage to express our love. Only to be rejected like we’re a psychopath. Then, the rejector is often caught saying, “The world needs more love and compassion.”
Such a unique world. Nobody knows what’s the right way and the wrong way. 

The universe wants us to be responsible of our own action. Hence, doesn’t give us a specific guidelines on living and being. 

But, 

“Oh lord! I am without guidance. Please, guide me…”

Sunday Chill

Today, on Sunday 10 April, 2016. 
Chilling in Bangkok at Emquartier Mall
Nice lunch at the restaurant called The Chop. Mozza Sticks was my favorite. 

  
 

   
    
 Then finally came outside near the bushes below the Phrom Phong train station. 

   
 
It it not everyday in Bangkok, that we have the enthusiasm to come outside on a hot Sunday. Today, we have been blessed with some light cool breeze. Which makes smoking cigarette a delightful appetizer. 

  
After this, I’ll probably head back to a place to sit and chill. Most likely, my friends small hotel/lodge in Ekkamai Soi between 4 and 6. 
I’m a lazy person. But, today I’m in a quite good mood to walk around a bit. Must be because of my comfortable Sunday kicks #Adidas

  

<>

We are what our thoughts have made us; so take care about what you think. Words are secondary. Thoughts live; they travel far. 

   – ThoughtMonger Guru Swami Vivekananda

 

From Book: Living Thoughts Of Great People – Thoughtmonger Eknath Easwaran

Osho on Art of Witnessing

Question – What is your way of meditation?

Osho – My way of meditation is very simple. There are one hundred and twelve methods of meditation. Out of all of those I have chosen the most simple — the most easily done. I call it witnessing. The moment you witness something you become separate from it, you are the witness, the thing becomes an object — the witnessed.

If you are walking on the road, and you are also witnessing that you are walking — not going along just like a robot, mechanical, everyday habit, the road is known, the legs know it, you can even walk with closed eyes. But walking with absolute alertness every step, every fall of a leaf, every ray of the sun, every bird flying in front of you, fully alert… slowly, slowly, you become aware that you are not the body that is walking, you are something inside which is witnessing.

Once you have witnessed your body, you have got the knack of the method. Then you start witnessing your thoughts — sitting silently, just watching the rush of thoughts, not interfering, not saying, “This is good. This is bad.” Not justifying, not appreciating, no judgment… non-judgmental witnessing, just like the mirror. Anybody passes by, the mirror reflects it; that’s all, it makes no comment.

Strangely enough, when you stop making comments on the thoughts, they begin to stop; your comments keep them alive. Once you are simply a mirrorlike witness, thoughts disappear, and you become aware of a deeper layer, of emotions, moods, which are very subtle. You are not even aware many times that you are sad. You are often not aware of what your emotional state is — it is very deep, there is a thick layer of thoughts. 

When thoughts have stopped, then you become aware of a very subtle breeze — and there is a great joy to see it pass. The method remains the same — you remain a witness without judgment. First body, second mind, third heart. And the fourth happens on its own. I call my way the fourth way because after the third you cannot do anything.

Once your emotions and moods disappear, suddenly there is a quantum leap — the witness has nothing to witness anymore. It comes home. It witnesses itself. It becomes both the seer and the seen, the object and the subject, and for the first time you have unity. This experience of absolute organic unity of your consciousness has been called by different names — moksha, nirvana, liberation, enlightenment, illumination. 

Whatever word you choose makes no difference. But this is the ultimate peak, this is the ultimate goal of human life. So my method is very simple. You need not even sit to do it. You can do it anywhere — walking on the street, sitting in the bus, sitting in the plane, eating, even sleeping. When you are going to sleep you don’t fall asleep suddenly, it takes a few minutes; just watch how the sleep comes in. 

Slowly, slowly, you will see sleep coming in, and as your witnessing becomes deeper there comes a moment when you can see that the whole night you are asleep yet still alert. I have tried almost all one hundred and twelve methods. That list is exhaustive, there is no possibility of adding a single method more. You can make a method of combinations, but those one hundred and twelve are exhaustive.

Out of them all I have chosen witnessing, because most of them are based on this in different ways. For example, if while making love you also witness, it becomes tantra. Tantra has taken one method, used it for love, and changed the whole sexual energy into a spiritual phenomenon. That’s what I have been talking about, and I have been misunderstood by almost everybody. They think I am teaching free sex. I am teaching meditative sex, and they think I am teaching free sex. 

I was simply teaching that if you can make sex an object of meditation you can become free of it — because with meditation the energy starts moving higher and higher. My sannyasins who have been with me are puzzled that they have lost all interest in sex. And the people who have been condemning me — that is their own imagination, their own creation, the whole idea of free sex. 

But it is sensational, particularly in a country which is very repressive about sex. To me, sex is as natural as everything else. If we can make sleeping a meditation, if we can make eating a meditation, why leave sex out? And sex is so powerful that it should not be left out; otherwise, that will that it should not be left out; otherwise, that will create disturbance. It should be absorbed into your total meditative process. It should become an organic unity.

Perhaps the Tantrikas understood this 1000 years ago. They did; they had something substantial. The Tantrikas were not part of a religion but of a very rebellious group of religious people, who created Khajuraho and thousands of other temples around. All other religions are talking almost rubbish about God, about heaven and hell.

Tantrikas were the first scientific religious people who took possession of their energy — which was already available. They managed to transform it in the same way that later somebody transformed the electricity from the clouds to become a light in your house. Nobody would have conceived before that the electricity flashing in the clouds could run your fans and your air-conditioners and your railways.

Tantrikas had the first insight that man’s sexual energy can be transformed easily. The only barrier is repression. If you repress it, then you cannot transform it. Don’t repress sexual energy, don’t condemn it, but create a friendship with it, that’s what I have been saying. Don’t think of it as a sin; it is not — you are born of it. The whole life is sex. If you call sex sin, then the whole life becomes sin, then the whole existence becomes sin — and this is not a religious approach to the world. We should make the whole world divine — not sin. But nobody reports what I have been saying; they just go on misinforming people. This is a misfortune — that journalism still is not literature.

Source: ” The Last Testament, Vol 4, Chapter 15 ” – Osho

ThoughtMonger Cavalry

 

 This blog was established to unite all the ThoughtMongers of the World to spread peace and non-violence, while entertaining them through presentation of varieties of Thoughts transformed into Powerful Word Meaning.
Objective: To recruit a large Cavalry of ThoughtMongers, who will unite to reform the world and shape it into a more suitable environment to nurture humanity even further.

   My biggest aim is to eliminate world hunger. Its one of the basic needs that has not been provided to some people of the world. In a time of business, where people deal about millions of dollars in their daily life, while the government deals with billions of dollars.
I simply wonder, with so much money how come we could not keep the world fed ?

All in all, eliminating world hunger and enhancing peace and prosperity is one of the difficult tasks to accomplish. So, through this Blog, I wish to make a movement to unite people to form new strategists of the world called  “ThoughtMonger Cavalry.”